Why people have affairs?
Talk about a loaded subject that no one wants to speak about, this is it. Funny thing, extramarital affairs have been going on since the beginning of the world. Extramarital relationships can be fraught with troubles, cause sorrow, and other troubles. Plus you should wrap your brain around all the other issues, there’s that truth and sincerety thing, money, age dissimilarity, religious background, shame, and on and on. I anticipate there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the intention of this post I shall identify an affair as a long term, maybe months long relationship of a sexual nature between two individuals of whom one or both are married to other wives/husbands, adult dating for merried.
Why do married people have extramarital affairs? There are as many reasons as there are men seeking an affair. I think mostly though it is only the human state, the need for love, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and appreciated. Here are a several explanations I have run across.
Naturally we as human beings are all sexual creatures. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is pleasurable and exciting, and sex makes us get away the world for a brief period of time. This euphoria exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels elevated enough. Somebody can turn the wish on and off, some are brilliant at controlling it and others are so-so at best. But we all have it, young and mature, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the excitement of the pursue. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the love for another individual, for some it is the wish to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the entire romance thing. These needs and yearnings can be so strong they rise above the taboos humanity has erected against extramarital affairs. For many people the yearnings will overcome their worries and make them risk the rage of not only their relatives, but society too. So why, what is the method?
Sex Addicts, possibly some of us are. Sex is very good, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of physically motivated sex addicts and can find away to have an affair and not hurt your relatives or anyone else? You would need to lessen the hazard you are taking. If you have the approach that a good affair is one that is beneficial to everyone, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I think this is the major group, gigantic really. There are many couples whose marital relationships is over, but they feel comfy in the way they live, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your spouse but there is no romance. Also there are the kids to look after. Your money are so entwined. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to live jointly besides love and sex.
Physical reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical reasons that prevent them completing the sex operation, at least not with their spouse. An extra-marital affair from time to time solves the trouble while keeping the marriage intact.
Ignoring, sorrowfully this is a regular reason I fear. One or the other, as a rule the guy is sexually neglecting his female for a number of reasons. As a man I truly am grateful to you guys neglecting your ladies and making them accessible to us men of romance, making them “milf wives” But I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Then there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not just neglectful, but evil.
Something is just misplaced in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Probably its romance that is missing, could be it is a lack of love, maybe caring is disappeared, maybe it is the intimacy, could be neglect. Maybe we have simply grown separately, our general interests diverged. Maybe it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my life, is diverce of what you want. Could be I simply do not know what I want from the marriage anymore. Maybe, just maybe I miss that emotion that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The major reason people give is, they search for the excitement that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to get away, for economic gain, for vengeance and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.
Tags: affairs, Dating, dating married people, extramarital affairs, Marriage, married dating, seeking an affair